grindmonkeh

I'm back to work after being out for a week and a half with hoof and mouth disease. It's hand, foot, and mouth disease actually, which I must have got from either my prolonged disuse of soap or my increased sexual activity with vagrants. I wouldn't recommend contracting it unless you want to discard the ability to eat for several days, but hey...the time off of work is nice. Halloween sucked as I was off and on a fever, so I pretty much slept through it.

I started watching Six Feet Under...I just finished the first season and I'm hooked. I also got a chance to game a bit for the first time in a while. I played Counter-Strike and Oblivion, but I really need a new game. Any recommendations would be cool. (Is Battlefield 2142 really as bad as I've read?) An expansion for Oblivion would be rocksauce. I also recorded a cover of the Teen Titans theme for the hell of it. I'll post a link after I re-record the lead. A co-worker just picked up the new Stephen King novel, so I'm going to speed-read the last two books of the Legacy of the Drow series so I can read it.

Current Music: Samael - Ceremony of Opposites

books read this year(® Alek):

Panel to Panel: From the Pages of Dark Horse Comics... - Randy Stradley
Star Wars - Dark Lord - James Luceno
The Punisher Vol. 1: Welcome Back, Frank - Garth Ennis
Frankenstein: Book One - Prodigal Son - Dean Koontz & Kevin J. Anderson
Frankenstein: Book Two - Cty of Night - Dean Koontz & Ed Gorman
Odd Thomas - Dean Koontz
Forever Odd - Dean Koontz
The Legacy - R.A. Salvatore
Starless Night - R.A. Salvatore

THE CARDINALS WIN THE WORLD MOTHERFUCKING SERIES!!!!!!!!!

How about one more win at home?!?

4-day weekend ala kid with fever.

I have my Seagull 12-String Acoustic guitar for sale on Ebay. Below is the correspondence I've had with a potential buyer who likes wasting my time.

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October 21st
eguy114 is a potential buyer.
how much would you want if I bought it now?
My reply:Two just sold for right about $300 dollars...
the links are here:
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&ih=001&sspagename=STRK%3AMEWA%3AIT&viewitem=&item=110042066356&rd=1&rd=1
and here:
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&ih=010&sspagename=STRK%3AMEWA%3AIT&viewitem=&item=200034510136&rd=1&rd=1

I'll take $280.00 plus shipping outright. Thanks again!

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October 22nd
eguy114 is a bidder
how bout 240? My hubby also collects guitars but his seagull is the favorite but has seen better days. How would u ship it? Just worried bout being broken during shipping.
My reply: I'll take $240 for it. I'm going to ship it UPS ground...$30 dollars. That includes insurance. If you'd like it for $240 + S&H ($270)...then paypal that amount to *******@isugw.indstate.edu and I'll end the auction early. I'll ship the guitar within 24 hours of payment. If you have any questions then feel free to call me any morning this week between 8am and noon (central time) at 618-586-**** and I'll be happy to answer them. If I'm not home then leave a message and I'll likely call back within a short time. Thank you!

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October 24th
eguy114 is a bidder.
So far there are no more bidders, If I offered you 125 would you take it??
My reply: *I didn't reply to this as I was asleep while this and the next message sat in my inbox.*

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October 24th
eguy114 is a bidder.
Not sure if u got this message. would u take 120 right now as there are no more bidders?
My reply: The auction has 4 DAYS left and 40 PEOPLE watching it. You offered me $240 for the guitar and I accepted. In your next message you offered $125, and now you're offering $120. If you want to wait and see how much it brings, then bid that $120 on it and maybe you'll win it...but I'll guarantee it won't touch it. I'm not ending the auction early for anything less than $240 + $30 s&h. Happy bidding.

Hi, John, my name is Ethan Albright. I play line for the Washington Redskins. You probably already knew that, so I’ll continue. I am writing in regards to the overall player rating of 53 that I have received in Madden NFL Football 2007. I feel that this is farking bullshiat and you should kiss my mother-farking ass. Ahmed Carroll was rated a 78 and the Packers just cut his ass on a Tuesday morning after his performance in a Monday night game. That is pretty terrible. The worst part is that his overall rating was sniffing 80.

You know what, John? Two can play this game. I rate you a farking 12. I rate you a farking 12 in Ethan Albright Football 2000-ever… except for in the category of ball-licking. That is where I will spot you a 98 rating. You will receive this score because I will never give your blubbery ass a 99 in any category. Take that, pencil-dick. Go do Al Micheals or something. Boom. Score one for Red Beard.

It’s also pretty wonderful that my awareness rating was 59. You make it sound like I wake up in the morning, helplessly shiat and piss myself, then lose three of my teeth before I discover that I am trying to eat a rock for breakfast. fark, John, I understand you saying that I am slow and lacking athleticism, but a rating like this pretty much labels me as retarded. Rod “He Hate Me” Smart has a 52 in this category. Electronic Arts is saying that seven rating points separate me and the breathing embodiment of the perfect oxymoron. Rod Smart struggled to arrange words in sentence form. Cave men had better hold of the English language. The only actions that separate point values of ignorance at this embarrassing level are things like using your own toothbrush to wipe your ass. I basically edged out Rod by my lack of shiat teeth. If I take a night school class, could you bump me up to a 60?

I guess I just can’t fathom the fact that I am the absolute worst player rated out of the entire NFL. fark, man, there are some shiatty guys out there. Amongst everyone, I was rated the absolute worst.

I have received the impression that you feel that I am lacking in the agility category. I should consider a walk through my living room where I don’t crash through a wall or kick over furniture a resounding success. My agility rating on your game is 33. It makes it sound like I just topple over if I start walking too fast. Ted Washington is rated a 40 in agility. He is listed at 365 pounds. If Ted Washington tied a white lady up and made her wear a metal bikini, he’d look just like Jabba the Hut.

Red Alert!
John, you are such a farking dick. I also noticed that my kick return rating was a 0. I was rated a farking zero? So you feel that I shouldn’t even receive a 10, or even a 5? You are pretty much saying that I couldn’t even fall forward on a ball kicked in my direction. I would just stand there and let the ball bounce off of my farking face. fark that, John, I returned an onside kick 6 yards in 2002. You should have just slapped a - 4 on me and had the EA staff ambush me with paintball guns.

Finally, I would like to comment on an unlikely topic, my pass coverage ratings. I see that I am a better at man-to-man coverage (31) than zone (21). fark me sideways with a lunchbox. Where did these scores even come from? How much time is spent coming up with the pass coverage ratings of offensive lineman? Can I have that job? Let’s see here, I think that Orlando Pace would be slightly better at jumping intermediate routes than Larry Allen. While I’m at it, I can assign the passing ratings for offensive lineman as well. I can use mine as a guide.

I was rated with a throwing power of 17 and accuracy of 16. Orlando Pace has a 22 power and 17 accuracy rating. Did someone at EA really put time into figuring out that Orlando Pace edges out Ethan Albright in both throwing power and accuracy? I will challenge him any day. My horrible passer ratings are of greatest misfortune to my son, Red Beard Jr. The poor boy is not only hideously ugly and covered by freakishly large freckles. He also has to suffer through playing catch with me and my senile-elderly-woman-type passer ratings. A session of tossing the pigskin usually consists of me missing my son by thirty yards in sporadic directions. I led him in front of a fire truck once and my wife kicked my ass. This is because of my 76 toughness rating. Yes, a 76 is far better than the other ratings, but I’m a farking lineman, damn it. NFL Linemen are considered to be synonymous with toughness. According to your game, I am a retarded, uncoordinated, pussy-ass farkwad that can’t fall on a kickoff, throw, or spell. I am, however, slightly better at manning up on a receiver than dropping into zone coverage. You lose your mind more and more each year, old man.

fark you, John. Please expect to find red pubes in various meals you consume for the rest of your life. If you fark with Ethan Albright, you call down the thunder.

Rot in Hell,

Ethan Albright

HowManyOfMe.com

There are:
939
people with my name
in the U.S.A.

How many have your name?

The Nightmare Before Christmas Special Edition Soundtrack has a couple of seemingly good covers by Fiona Apple and Panic at the Disco. I may try to catch the new edition in the theater.

( meme bandwagon boredomkill. )

Current Music: Dark Days (dj shadow dominated soundtrack)

stolen from a farker:

May I help you?

No thanks, just looking.

The Cardinals win the pennant!
Beltran at the plate...bases loaded...bottom of the 9th with two outs and two strikes...what a nail-biter. And Yadi is clutch!

The post man was nice today...he brought me the Salvatore Legacy of the Drow anthology, Peavey Jack Daniels guitar picks, and an Indian Motorcycles shirt. I also put together a jigsaw puzz with some help from

falseye. Then I slept, and got up in time to see the Cardinals finish the series with the Mets, and now I no longer have to tolerate the New York sportswriters and commentators' collective journalistic fellatio of their home team in every major media outlet!

I may have to miss the first game of the World Series since I have to go to my brother's wedding and reception...unless there's a television in the bar.

I'm a bit worried about how St. Louis will fare against Detroit.

puzzle...

Current Mood: happeh!

Children of the Secret State - a (depressing) Discovery Channel documentary of the poverty in North Korea.

North Korea Nuclear Documentary - a second Discovery documentary...North Korea's history relevant to current events.

Current Music: Silver Bullet (movie)

Perfect Strangers - sickingly sweet...and funneh.

Steve Wynn's Picasso - this is old news by now, I heard a report on NPR about this shortly after reading this account.

Pumpkin Carving - I've gotta try this.

Sky car and the world of tomorrow.

Ben takes a photo of himself every day.

Current Music: Angel Blake - Angel Blake

Frank Miller's 300 - Movie Trailer - speaks for itself.

Eddie Van Halen is fucking crazy. - A recent transcription from an interview with Howard Stern gives the idea that he may need to get a fucking grip.

Battle of the album covers - for music enthusiasts.

Don't Think Twice, It's Alright - a great song with cool eye-candy.

Orion - An awesome acoustic cover of the Metallica classic by Rodrigo y Garbriela (<---Diablo Rojo really jams too).

25 Greatest Batman Graphic Novels - Yes, I'm a nerd (a non-mmorpg-screencap-posting nerd).

Please, suh!

...so I gave him one.

And my stormtrooper pumpkin.

While perusing a few random sites tonight I've found some weird link errors. All the comic links below the strip on http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic are linked to babelfish. *edit...They fixed it. Go to http://www.bestbuy.com and use the store locator. I really didn't want to look at mp3/xm-radio players, I really wanted help with microsoft email.

Fucking HOFF-STYLE!!!! <--(nsfw...Pantera drops the f-bomb)

Current Music: Pantera- Fucking Hoffstyle

In a nutshell, don't ever drop your camera (or let it leap from your jacket pocket in this case) into a toilet. I'm lucky it still works...and that the toilet was unused.

George (and other random images from Septiembre)...

George lives behind my second garage.

I named it George because if it had a chance meeting with Mr. Washington it would tear his face off, steal his wig, and demand the presidency. Also, he's a very curious spider.

I bottled my blackberry wine a couple of weeks ago. I'm going to rack it soon after sedimentation has fully settled. It has a pretty unique flavor...amazingly it tastes like wine, which is a quite favorable result of the whole wine-making deal.

Score! Thanks Roy!

This list is so pitiful. I've reached an all-time low in reading ...in quantity and quality.

books read this year(® Alek):

Panel to Panel: From the Pages of Dark Horse Comics... - Randy Stradley
Star Wars - Dark Lord - James Luceno
The Punisher Vol. 1: Welcome Back, Frank - Garth Ennis
Frankenstein: Book One - Prodigal Son - Dean Koontz & Kevin J. Anderson
Frankenstein: Book Two - Cty of Night - Dean Koontz & Ed Gorman

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Ethan Albright's open letter to EA sports.

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bahahaha

Good day, eh!

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links!

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holy awesome media roundup

Mason wanted a mohawk.

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September 2010

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