(no subject)
Feb. 26th, 2002 02:29 amMy appointment with the Urologist finally rolled up today. I was hoping for...something...other than a waste of time and money.
An hour and a half after the time of my appointment the doctor finally saw me. He asked me where it hurt. I told him. He had me sit on the examination table while he pressed the areas I had indicated and asked me if it hurt. Hablas fucking Ingles? I almost passed out from the pain. He took me into a room where my x-rays were illuminated on a wall for display, and asked if I thought I knew what was wrong. I thought I was going to throw up. I asked if I had a kidney stone. He said yes. He asked if I knew I only had one kidney. I said yes. I sat down before I landed on the floor with a face plant. He had a nurse bring me a cold washcloth. I wasn't sure what to do with it. I put it on my face. The white noise went away, and the doctor said, "I don't want to do anything right now...we'll give it two weeks and I want to see you again...take pain pills as you need to and if you run out let me know." I needed to then. Thanks Dr. Obvious.
I almost forgot to mention that I got to urinate in a cup with a screw on lid.
I didn't want to go see Clutch tonight anyhow. The security would have patted me down and taken away the strainer that I have to piss through and the pills that knock me on my ass. Piss on Clutch. They can't take away my strainer.
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet's miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine!

An hour and a half after the time of my appointment the doctor finally saw me. He asked me where it hurt. I told him. He had me sit on the examination table while he pressed the areas I had indicated and asked me if it hurt. Hablas fucking Ingles? I almost passed out from the pain. He took me into a room where my x-rays were illuminated on a wall for display, and asked if I thought I knew what was wrong. I thought I was going to throw up. I asked if I had a kidney stone. He said yes. He asked if I knew I only had one kidney. I said yes. I sat down before I landed on the floor with a face plant. He had a nurse bring me a cold washcloth. I wasn't sure what to do with it. I put it on my face. The white noise went away, and the doctor said, "I don't want to do anything right now...we'll give it two weeks and I want to see you again...take pain pills as you need to and if you run out let me know." I needed to then. Thanks Dr. Obvious.
I almost forgot to mention that I got to urinate in a cup with a screw on lid.
I didn't want to go see Clutch tonight anyhow. The security would have patted me down and taken away the strainer that I have to piss through and the pills that knock me on my ass. Piss on Clutch. They can't take away my strainer.
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet's miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine!

no you diiiiiiiiii'int!!!!!!!
Date: 2002-02-28 12:56 pm (UTC)GB youre cracking me up!!!!!
i wouldnt let you not let me clean up after you. damn. it made sense in my head but typed out.. im not sure! you get my drift :)
hmmm... someone doesnt like dave navarro! HAHAHA
robin and trent!!!!!! OH that is TOO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!
youre really shy about your fetal position!!! hehehe.
my brother..... had major problems when he was born.... like, he had a bunch of operations and shit, but i mean.... nothing at all since. hes perfectly fine and functioning with one kidney... the doctors just keep an extra eye on it :)
Re: no you diiiiiiiiii'int!!!!!!!
Date: 2002-03-01 01:05 am (UTC)Oh...I don't mind Dave Navarro...I just picked him as an innocent random object of lust for Axl Rose since he was in on the Oh My God "Guns N Roses" project...hell, he was probably too busy with his own fetal position for dirty butt sex with Axl or Robin. If either of us knew anything about promoting and venue management we could be rich...FETALFEST 2002...just think of who the possible headliners could be.
It figures that I would have to find a doctor with an extra eye since I only have one kidney. I can just imagine a specialized medical facility that has doctors and patients with odd numbers of body parts for a compensatory type of universal equilibri...nevermind. ::)