(no subject)
Oct. 8th, 2000 10:07 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
grindmonkehIt's Sunday morning and I'm lounging at my *ex-step-dad's house watching television, messing around with his wife's comp, and eating beans and cornbread.
*(Charley was married to my mom from the time I was four years old until my senior year of high school when I was eighteen. I've been calling him "dad" for twenty years, and he is the one parent that I would most hate to let down in expectations.)
We went out to Montana Mike's steakhouse last night in Vincennes...we had great steaks and many beers. He introduced conversation during dinner regarding my reasoning and behavior of past relationships that didn't work. (-commercial break- *this conversation was brought to you by Beer!*) I have left myself in retrospective wonder following many impulsively ended relationships, but I've really only spoken of it in my livejournal. He shares the idea that my inability of commitment is a result of the dysfunction that plagues my family and that I should try falling in love again. Can anyone recommend a good srhink?
It seems that an abundance of alcohol brings guilt and the need of atonement to both of my fathers. A smile and reassuring slap on the shoulder does the trick followed by a little humor...it shows them I'm not a fucked up basketcase. I'm not, dammit!
Since he had to go to work at six o'clock a.m. today, he crashed early and I stayed up and finished a level of Cataclysm before falling asleep around one-thirty in mid-movie. I'm killing time before I go visit my dad and step-mom and then back to Terre Haute to see Betsy before work tonight.
listening to: Nevermore - The Politics of Ecstasy on an unbelievably overrated Bose Wave system.
*(Charley was married to my mom from the time I was four years old until my senior year of high school when I was eighteen. I've been calling him "dad" for twenty years, and he is the one parent that I would most hate to let down in expectations.)
We went out to Montana Mike's steakhouse last night in Vincennes...we had great steaks and many beers. He introduced conversation during dinner regarding my reasoning and behavior of past relationships that didn't work. (-commercial break- *this conversation was brought to you by Beer!*) I have left myself in retrospective wonder following many impulsively ended relationships, but I've really only spoken of it in my livejournal. He shares the idea that my inability of commitment is a result of the dysfunction that plagues my family and that I should try falling in love again. Can anyone recommend a good srhink?
It seems that an abundance of alcohol brings guilt and the need of atonement to both of my fathers. A smile and reassuring slap on the shoulder does the trick followed by a little humor...it shows them I'm not a fucked up basketcase. I'm not, dammit!
Since he had to go to work at six o'clock a.m. today, he crashed early and I stayed up and finished a level of Cataclysm before falling asleep around one-thirty in mid-movie. I'm killing time before I go visit my dad and step-mom and then back to Terre Haute to see Betsy before work tonight.
listening to: Nevermore - The Politics of Ecstasy on an unbelievably overrated Bose Wave system.