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grindmonkehThis is another instance where I have failed to find the appropriate words for life's recent surprises without swaying toward age old cliches or pathetically soupy overtones that paint my heart like a target, but I've decided to let humility take the helm in purveying feelings that once asunder are perceived now to be whole in the light of chance. So I've decided to try typing offhand anything that comes to mind and post it rather than compose an entry and delete it...again.
She simply amazes me. The days since we began talking now seem covered by the opaque dew of a morning dream where laughter is constant in the eyes of a sun that burns away aging shadows with speculation and insight. I'm not sure what that means either...but it made sense when my thoughts shaped it. We already knew eachother well from hours of conversation before we met for the first time on Saturday night and spent the last half of the weekend together. She simply amazes me. I found that I could say anything that I was thinking to her without inhibition or regret. She will read this too, and as easy as it has been to say to her how I feel, I've been hesitant to divulge to this forum maybe for fear of setting myself up for a fall. Everything feels natural with her, and I think it could be too easy to rush into things headlong. I'm sure that it's her that keeps things on a realistic level, and I know that is somewhat of a blessing. This is the last thing I expected from our initial interactions, and now I feel totally disarmed when in the past I've always been fortified with doubts. Her spirit is like no other, and I can't think of a single thing that I would change about her. That has never happened to me. With time we'll know one another better, and I can be absolutely certain about all the things I've left unsaid.
As I left her house and drove down the interstate I found that the other vehicles were passing me effortlessly, and noticed that I wasn't even driving the speed limit. I found it hard to accelerate and hurry the distance between us. My thoughts have hardly escaped there since I pulled out of her driveway. Maybe that's why I've had such trouble conveying in retrospect what is still happening.
She simply amazes me. The days since we began talking now seem covered by the opaque dew of a morning dream where laughter is constant in the eyes of a sun that burns away aging shadows with speculation and insight. I'm not sure what that means either...but it made sense when my thoughts shaped it. We already knew eachother well from hours of conversation before we met for the first time on Saturday night and spent the last half of the weekend together. She simply amazes me. I found that I could say anything that I was thinking to her without inhibition or regret. She will read this too, and as easy as it has been to say to her how I feel, I've been hesitant to divulge to this forum maybe for fear of setting myself up for a fall. Everything feels natural with her, and I think it could be too easy to rush into things headlong. I'm sure that it's her that keeps things on a realistic level, and I know that is somewhat of a blessing. This is the last thing I expected from our initial interactions, and now I feel totally disarmed when in the past I've always been fortified with doubts. Her spirit is like no other, and I can't think of a single thing that I would change about her. That has never happened to me. With time we'll know one another better, and I can be absolutely certain about all the things I've left unsaid.
As I left her house and drove down the interstate I found that the other vehicles were passing me effortlessly, and noticed that I wasn't even driving the speed limit. I found it hard to accelerate and hurry the distance between us. My thoughts have hardly escaped there since I pulled out of her driveway. Maybe that's why I've had such trouble conveying in retrospect what is still happening.
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good for you!!!!!!!!!
(no subject)
Date: 2002-10-17 10:46 am (UTC)(no subject)
(no subject)
Date: 2002-10-17 02:43 pm (UTC)yayeeeee yeahhhhhhh
i am really happy to hear that you are happy.... ooohhhhh monkehs in luuuuuuuhhhhh :)
(OMG! Q had said "bump n grind" AAAAHHHHH!!!!!!! "i dont see nothin wrong...." OMG!! HA!! too much.)